Chapter 12 - En Route to Dor-ko's Prison

After Andres and his captors had plodded on for another hour or so, they were completely engulfed in darkness. Just a few flickering glimmers of moonlight penetrated through the thick canopy of the woods. The pace got slower as the horses struggled to follow the barely-visible path. Finally Andres heard Chub’s whiny, high-pitched voice cut through the darkness. “Let’s hold up, Pipes,” he said. “We should probably get some rest.”

Without saying a word in reply, Pipes halted his horse and dismounted. Andres tried to move as well, but every muscle was sore from his hours of fighting and riding. He wiggled a little, but his legs didn’t seem to want to do what his brain was instructing them to do. Then, to his surprise, he felt an arm reach up and gently grab him around the waist. “Let me give you a hand,” said Pipes. The man with the tree-trunk arms then lowered him to the ground. Andres was grateful for the help.

Andres was famished, but he didn’t dare to ask for anything. So he just crawled over to the foot of a nearby tree and felt some moss. Figuring that it would make a nice bed, Andres laid his head down on a protruding root and started to close his eyes. But just before his eyelids were shut tight, he saw a big blob moving toward him in the darkness. As he feared, it was Chub. “We’d better tie this punk up,” he whined. “We don’t want to take any chances.” Andres didn’t even have the energy to try and resist.

But just as the thug was about to reach down and tie his feet together, Andres saw another arm shoot out of the darkness. It was Pipes, and his massive hand quickly wrapped itself around Chub’s flabby arm. “Hey Chub, don’t you think the kid’s been through enough?” he asked. “I mean, think about it, Chub. Where is he going to run? Where would you run, if you could even get your lazy body to move that fast?”

Andres heard a grunt. As he continued to peer through the darkness, he saw the blob start to move back in the opposite direction. He then heard Chub’s voice call out, “All right, Pipes, have it your way. But if he gets away, Dor-ko will have your head on a silver platter. Don’t think you can cross me and just get away with it!” Andres then felt the ground shake a little bit as Chub hit the ground. Within seconds, loud snoring enveloped their little campsite.

Just as Andres was about to descend into unconsciousness, he felt a hand gently shake his shoulder. Andres looked up and once again saw Pipes. “Here, take this,” he said as he stuffed something into Andres’ right hand. Andres knew immediately from the smell that it was a piece of smoked venison. Before Andres could express his thanks, Pipes continued. “Let me just tell you this, Andres. Chub can be a real helpful guy if you just get him talking. Now don’t say a word and get some sleep.” With those words, Pipes released Andres’ shoulder and went away.

Andres was amazed at the apparent friendliness of Pipes. As far as kidnappers went, he was a pretty nice guy. Andres nibbled on his venison and made it last as long as his empty stomach would allow him. Then he went to sleep. Andres was never one to let awkward or uncomfortable circumstances prevent him from getting some shut-eye. He could sleep anywhere.

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The next day, Andres continued his journey atop Pipes’ horse, riding behind his captor. It wasn’t long before they veered off to the right. Within a couple of hours, they began to emerge from the woods and enter the western highlands. Andres got his bearings and figured out that they were departing from the southern woods and emerging into the Jagged Mountains. From everything he’d heard, Slumbutter and Dor-ko had established a stronghold on the other side of these mountains, which bordered the kingdom of Aberdeen to the west. In other words, he was headed straight into the heart of enemy territory.

However, it seemed to Andres that the route they were taking was extremely circuitous. They seemed to avoid any high points or open areas, choosing instead to skirt around every hilltop. Although trees were fairly scarce in the Jagged Mountains, Chub was constantly looking to direct their path through any patches of woods that might be available. And even more strangely, if they came to a high point that they simply couldn’t skirt around, Chub would duck his head and ride as low as he could, as though hiding. Andres was amused. Chub’s body was so massive that he couldn’t really camouflage his presence, no matter what he did. Interestingly, Pipes did not join Chub in his furtive movements. He always sat tall atop the horse.

As the day wore on, Andres grew weary of the constant twists and turns. Finally, he blurted out, “Hey Chub, what’s with this constant dodging and weaving? Why can’t we just go in a straight line and get through these mountains? I’m getting horse-sick back here!”

Chub stopped immediately. He hopped off his horse; Andres could have sworn that he set off a mild earthquake as he hit the ground. He then grabbed a stick that was lying by his horse’s feet and waddled over to Andres. His face was red and his lips were creased tight. Without saying a word, he drew back as though the strike Andres in the head. Andres closed his eyes and braced for the blow.

But the blow never came. Instead, when Andres opened his eyes, he saw that Pipes had reached around and caught the stick. “Look, Chub, let’s just keep going,” Pipes said. “I know the kid is annoying, but our orders were to bring him back alive. If we kill him, we’ll be in trouble. And if we wound him--well, it’s a lot of blood that we’ll have to clean up, and you know how messy blood can be. So let’s just keep going.” Then Pipes turned to Andres and said, “Hey kid, why don’t you tell him you’re sorry?” He winked at Andres as he did so.

Then Andres remembered Pipes strange words from the night before, about how helpful Chub could be if he just got him talking. So Andres swallowed his pride and said, “I’m real sorry, Mr. Chub. I’ll be quiet now, more or less, if that’s what you want.” Chub’s anger seemed to abate somewhat, and he returned to his horse. The journey resumed.

Andres decided to pursue his attempt to get Chub to talk. He might gain some information, and anyway it would help pass the time. So he said, “Hey Mr. Chub, I just want you to know something. You’re one of the bravest and cleverest kidnappers I’ve ever met. I...well, it is an honor to be the captive of such a great and noble villain.” It almost made Andres throw up to have to say it, but he needed to find some way to get the conversation rolling.

After a moment’s pause, Chub spoke up. “Well, I’m glad you recognize greatness when you see it!” he declared. “I’ve been doing this pretty much my whole life, so I’ve gotten pretty good at it.” Then he softened his voice and said, “To be honest, everyone says I’m very intimidating.”

Andres decided to play along. “Oh yes, that’s true. I think I’d be less scared if a herd of elephants came roaring at me that I would be if you came after me. There is no doubt: you are Mr. Intimidation.”

Chub seemed to swell with pride. “That’s a great name for me, punk. Yep, I’m ‘Mr. Intimidation’. Kids tremble at the sound of my name. It’s true.”

“They don’t even need to hear your name, Mr. Chub,” continued Andres. “They’ll tremble at the rumble of your footsteps.”

A smile of satisfaction came across Chub’s tiny little face. Then he spoke again. “Look punk, do you know where we professional kidnappers and highly-esteemed villains are taking you?”

“I’ve got no idea,” replied Andres. “You keep such good secrets.”

“Well, I’ll tell you,” said Chub. “You are heading to Dor-ko’s prison. We’ve got a special cell prepared for you. It is dark and damp with lots of rats scurrying around the floor. In fact, the sunlight never reaches this cell.”

“Oh my,” said Andres. “You must have saved that for me because I’m so dangerous. Thanks for thinking of me. I’m flattered.”

“Let me tell you something else,” continued Chub. “This cell has only one way in--through the ceiling. And there is no way out. Dor-ko threw away the key years ago. So once you get there, you will never get out.”

Andres tried to keep his panic in check. “Why are you saving such a special cell for little old me?” he managed to ask.

“Well, I guess I can tell you, since you’re going to prison for the rest of your pathetic little life. You see, Slumbutter and Dor-ko are planning an attack on Aberdeen. That’s why we captured you! Your father knows that our stronghold is on the other side of the Jagged Mountains. As soon as he discovers you are missing, he’ll gather together his army and try to save you. But while he’s gathering his army and heading west across the Jagged Mountains, guess what?”

There was an awkward pause. Andres realized that Chub was prompting him to answer. “Uh, what, Mr. Chub?” he said at last.

“Ah ha, this is just part of the trap! As your father and his army of white knights heads west, we will actually be secretly on the march through the southern woods. Even now, our great lumberjacks are slashing a road through the woods. Within days, that road will be complete. Our marvellous and fearless army will then march through the woods, cross Freedom Pass, and ultimately attack your castle from the south. Yes, we will attack from the south...the direction that no one thought possible!” At this point, Chub’s squeaky voice rose to a feverish pitch. “We will surprise everyone and attack the castle while it is completely unprotected! And then the kingdom will be ours! Ha ha haaaaa!”

As Chub’s goofy laugh trailed off, Andres thought of another question. “O great mastermind of kidnapping, let me ask you something else. Why are we taking such a roundabout route through these mountains?”

Chub replied by saying, “Don’t you know? Your father has sentries posted throughout the mountains. We’re simply trying to avoid detection.”

“But Mr. Chub, you are so brave and cunning,” Andres said. “I’m sure if someone spotted you, they wouldn’t dare to attack. From everything I’ve heard, whenever a sentry catches sight of you, he just goes into hiding because of your fearsome presence. Surely a mighty warrior like yourself doesn’t need to fear some simple-minded sentry.”

Chub thought about that for a minute. Andres noticed Chub’s head nodding up and down. Finally, Chub piped up and said, “You’re right, punk. I don’t gotta be afraid of nobody. After all, I’m Chub, the fearless and mighty kidnapper!” And with that, the riders resumed a more direct course through the mountains.